On Tuesday I had a cataract operation. I had the first assessment four months ago, the actual op’ was about fifteen minutes. I now look in the mirror in total surprise—as Don Williams would say.
It is incredible what we have with our NHS, I know people will say that we have paid for it all our working lives, but it must rank as the most cost effective health system that there is.
As I came out of the eye unit, I met a man that I had been in the same cardiac ward with a couple of years ago.
Of course, he didn’t recognise me—story of my life—but he was unmissable, I have never met such a sad looking man in my life.
I remembered how I tried to cheer this poor man up when we were in opposite beds, but everything I tried he found something to moan about.
He told me about his life and I could why he was so sad, he’s about sixty years old, he looked after his invalid mother for thirty years until her death, when ever he brought a girl friend home his mother would say she was not good enough and so he never married.
He told me that is the trouble with having a Jewish mother, no one is good enough for her son.
As soon as I realised he was Jewish, I thought I would tell him a joke that I had heard on the American TV show; ‘Old Jews telling jokes’.
As soon as I started he face slumped even more but I carried on regardless.
“An old Jewish couple living in New York, Rachel and Joe, Rachel was in the bathroom when she screamed for help, Joe rushed in only to see Rachel was stuck in the toilet bowl with just her legs and head and shoulder’s showing”.
David looked even more disgruntled, he said.
“That’s he oldest joke I have ever heard”
He then took over the joke, and I must say there is no one that can tell a Jewish joke like a sad Jewish man.
When he finished he didn’t even smile, and just said mildly funny, mildly funny.
I don’t think the the rest of the joke is suitable for the refined people of Chertsey Chatter, so I won’t finish it.